Warning! Teenagers make you old.

Way back when my first child was born, I was involved in a business group of people of similar circumstance. Every meeting would begin with 15-30 minutes of chatter about diaper changes, sleep times and teething issues. The oldest member of the group, the one whose babies had grown up, would sit quietly, a pitying look in his eyes. Every so often we would get "You have no idea how easy you have it now?"

We would all laugh. What could possible be worse than babies not sleeping through the night, a fever and mysterious rashes.

Well, now I have teenagers...two going on three (and I've told my youngest he is never to grow up)...I understand exactly what he what trying to say. Teenagers make you scream laugh and cry at the same time.

It wouldn't be so bad if I didn't remember my own teens so well. I wasn't exactly a wild child but there are still enough stories about that I would rather my parents not hear. Explanations I fudged a bit. Times I was out with people other than whom I said I was. Sleepovers that didn't involve sleep. But trust me, in the world of teenagers I did not stand out. And the few times my parents caught me in the grey zone, they had bigger problems to deal with.

It's that point of view that keeps throwing things off. Relating and identifying with your teenagers can only lead to sad 'Paris Hilton' situations. I am the parent now. I have to be the responsible one. I have to deal out rules and regulations...and enforce them. And when they are forgotten or broken, I am the one responsible for dishing out the consequences.

Instead of diaper changes I make sure they know how to use condoms.

Instead of worrying about them sleeping through the night, I wonder if they are in bed and what strategy to use to get them up before noon.

Instead of the pain of the first tooth, I pay for orthodontists to make them perfect and pray when they get home from rugby they still have a full set.

Exhausting work. My face has become wrinkled overnight. And I won't say how much weight I've gained.

Thank-god it will be over in 10 years. Just in time to be a grandmother.